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Japanese bra Engrish lulz

This is too funny. Mayu and I were at the drug store and found these bras with the ridiculous ENGRISH descriptions. We had a good laugh. People in Japan generally don’t understand English, and those responsible for the packaging of these items obviously do not either. Let’s start with the night time bra.

“Bust care while sleeping. Keep bust and side meat down.”

I’m sorry… what? Side meat? Keep it down? No, keep it in the fridge. That’s tomorrow’s dinner.

“This bra is just put on and a fat of a side and back is pulled.”

Well yeah, so you say it’s just put on, right? But that’s when it gets complicated. “A fat of a side?” Who are you calling fat? And your back is pulled? What’s going on again? I’m confused now.

This is what happens when you use a foreign language for decoration. Especially when you use Google Translate or something because you don’t know the language. There are stories like that one tattoo artist who was tattooing “spicy tofu” onto vapid people who didn’t know crap about Chinese characters but wanted to get permanently tattooed because they are vacuous trendies. Guys like that are heroes as far as I care.

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June? I thought we had June last year…

Well, June has only just begun… Hang in there! It’s Groomer Awareness Month, when degenerates making a mockery of womanhood hijack virtuous platitudes like “inclusion” to use it as a means of advancing their pedo predilections by shoving their junk into kids’ faces and literally promote evil with imagery of Satan and guillotines, like what happened at Target stores recently. It’s when Corporate America’s pandering becomes smokescreen for the indoctrination and the mutilation of children at the behest of Big Pharma, and we’re supposed to be happy about that. These corporations really couldn’t care less about the well-being of these people; they are only concerned about exploiting them for profit. Children are instinctively attracted to colorful rainbows, after all. They are being preyed upon by people who want to enslave them to pharmaceuticals for the rest of their life. Disgusting. So make this song your anthem for the month. Play it loud, run around your room, burn some calories, knock over some furniture if necessary. Lyrics are included. If you don’t know this song yet, TRUST ME, you’ll thank me for this. This based, politically-incorrect song is therapeutic and thrusts a big middle finger to debauchery and depravity. I’ve just listened to it for about the 30th time in a row now. God bless The Ramones.

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Nazi R2-D2

This bizarre plastic model kit by Imai comes from the days when Japan blatantly plagiarized stuff. Here is the “Command Robot VR-1” kit from their “Star Command” series, also known as “Nazi R2-D2.” I’ve actually seen this kit in person (at an IPMS show in Phoenix) and it comes with swastika decals. Sieg heil, you overweight glob of grease.

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A couple of clever ’80s game arcade memes

The first time I visited Japan was in 1998, and at that time all I saw were sit-down cabinets like the Sega Astro City, Taito Egret, Namco Cyberlead, etc. So, I was unaware that game centers here in Japan once had standing cabinets like America did until talking with my Japanese friend. He said that he would play Atari’s Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom in the ’80s. Atari had some successes in Japan back in the ’80s, especially Gauntlet and Marble Madness. And going back further, Breakout obviously made quite an impression in Japan, giving birth to the “block kuzushi” genre with Arkanoid being the most exemplary title. Dang, if only I could travel back in time, or at least Quantum Leap into my childhood self and relive those memories…